I’m alright. Bit lonely here and there but working so you know.
Yeah, I feel you on the loneliness. Been going through a fair bit of that myself lately. Not general loneliness, having a house has actually been cool because I have friends coming over now and then. More of that specific “companionship” loneliness. As I’ve been rambling on for months now, I’ll get to actively working on that once I get a few more things sorted out in my life.
Good to hear you’re working. Not having money is far more stressful than anything most jobs can throw at you.
1 Like
Well my job at the bar has been keeping me afloat here. I’ve pretty much met the wall with the financial. I meant working as in my books. I’m nearly done with my third comic serial and onto the next. Thought about taking a break so I can really work on the logistics. And that is the loneliness I was talking about. I’ve been flirting but it comes almost naturally as a bartender, you kind of have too if you want to get a decent tip. -face table- But yeah having your own house, that’s where it’s at. Yeah, depending on the house it may seem a bit barren at times. But I’ve gotten kind of back into Warhammer and me and a group of people have been having Warhammer and Fighting game nights. I’m trying (attempting) to get an actual group back together.
My luck after Steve left me nose-dived, hard. Some people know more in detail but it’s very few.
Managing it I think.
Social anxiety is a bitch though.
I aswell feel lonely, though said anxiety and other reasons prevent me from talking to other people.
I’ve been stressing about some stuff lately, I just need to get it off my chest. Basically not knowing how to deal with some people.
It is really the general feeling that a few people in my life are refusing to be straight up and honest with me, are avoiding me, or are essentially responding to me to keep up appearances. One person I know has been being this, and I have stopped talking to him. A second has legitimate and valid excuses for silence, but then takes time to respond to or spend time with other people. Then a few more people have just been super quiet with me, and I can’t help but have these suspicions. It is stressing me because I really don’t bring very many people close in with me, because I know I can be difficult to deal with so I have to feel a certain level of trust and also I don’t want to be a burden on people. So having one person out of very few treat me like ■■■■ and others be kind of doing the same things is really wearing on me. I don’t even know what to do about person #2, because I’m probably just worrying too much.
No responses necessary, I just needed to get that out around some people who might at least be able to relate to how I’m feeling. And at least I still know I have a few close friends who haven’t ever given me any reason to doubt them.
Damn, have to live with people who blame for things that I haven’t done. Well, f*ck those retards.
Same reason why my grandmother disowned me to be frank.
1 Like
There is nothing in the world that sets me off quicker than taking heat for something I either did not do or had no control over. I feel for ya.
1 Like
On the topic of feels (I’ll send you a pm Irish when I find the right words together.) and I know I should save this ■■■■■■■■ for Livejournal or something but I can’t help but feel it’s pouring into my overall attitude. I’ve been extremely frustrated lately with life and I’m not going to pull names and I’m not directly insulting you if you know…, you know who I’m talking about. I’ve been extremely frustrated with my writing to the point I feel like quitting it. I write a chapter or issue in this case, unedited, not in the “right format” as one’s would put it and I give it out to my friends for free. I feel like a lot of glaring at me for this but I don’t care. I’ve narrowed down the list so far now, I use to send it to like twenty (thirty altogether) something people on the old forums now I use email but I’ve narrowed down the list so far because those people didn’t give me feedback. I felt like they didn’t even read it, so it’s like you buying the issue at the comic book store and then letting it sit on the counter or even worse letting it get bent somewhere wedged between two surfaces. I’ve tried promoting it on my twitter but most of my twitter folks are quiet about it. I just asked somebody in DM about it and they usually response to me right away and it’s been about a day since they’ve commented on it. (he ain’t busy either.) I’ve tried to get my friend of (8-9 years now.) to draw for me but he won’t, I even have someone on deck to edit it but they’re busy. I tried to explain my frustration to another person I send it to and they told me to write it as if a novel… which offset me because someone else told me it was not in a comic book form. So whenever I do get feedback or critique on my books it’s one of four things.
- They don’t.
- They didn’t read it then try to slam it.
- It’s conflicting
- It’s unhelpful, (IE: It’s good or it’s bad. That doesn’t really help me improve.)
I’ve already shortened my third comic book by like twenty something issues. It was going to be seven arcs with sixty issues but currently I’ve wittled it down to forty five issues more looking towards thirty something issues now cause I’m just tired of it. I’m an introvert with extreme trust issues, I can’t force anybody to do anything, I’m not that charismatic and I don’t know… it’s just frustrating and I’ve been trying to keep that frustration down but the anger is just poisoning me. Because this isn’t just some fic I whipped up in a day. I’ve been working on this goal for about eighteen ■■■■■■■ years of my life. This isn’t just some ■■■■■■■ pipedream I can throw away like most people think it is. If I talk about this ■■■■ with people in my personal life, they think it’s a waste of time (why I broke up with my boyfriend.) and unrealistic. I’ve heard that one about a million times over the course of my life. Oh yeah, that thing you’ve been working on for most of your life, you can’t do it, you can’t pull it off. I’ve heard it a million times.
Moving on from there, it’s sort of connected but not really, I get on certain games and I find myself alone in most of them. Destiny, Dragon Age, Guild Wars (Odin really?), Diablo, Marvel Heroes what have you. I’ve gotten several people into games but none of really play with me. For example, I have a clan on Diablo 3, I’ve had since clans were announced… and nobody’s joined it and I’m looking at it right now thinking, “Well… ■■■■.” I know I’m not in the best place right now to welcome new friends or people or whatever but I feel incredibly lonely and I just need someone there, you know. Anyways, I’ve wasted enough of your time with this ■■■■.
Oh and the next ■■■■■■■■■■■■ to tell me this is all “first world problems,” do me a favor, before you post, shove an iron pole up your ■■■■■■■ ass. I don’t want to hear it.
Daerk, I’ll admit after the first few issues I stopped reading. Not as a commentary on your writing, just as a general lack of interest in reading anything at all. No excuse, really. Sorry I put you off to the side. I’ve done that with a great many things lately.
I would love to have ability to write or draw a comic book, but since I had all kinds of ■■■■■■■ problems, left drawing when I was 10. Feel your frustration.
Thought about purchasing a Wacom tablet, but surely my drawings would be pieces of ■■■■.
Does it bother you if I ask you for a digital copy?, want to read it and give you feedback, with the limited knowledge I have about comics.
Damn, figured out that a great chunk of us have problems. I would like to hug to all of you really.
I have a lot of problems (psychic, social, etc.) but for me It’s always people first.
Haven’t gotten around to reading the last issue you sended me.
Computer problems and helping Niels out was/is atm more important.
Me too. Sending you all awkward virtual hugs. I know sometimes just knowing other people understand and care helps.
It’s been a while but I finally got the gull to confront my crush. Now it’s all up to them… oh good Odin, this will end badly.
Oh, feels,
Time has called you away. It’s a splendid moment, perhaps when you’ve taken hesitant glances at us. All is too weary to submit, “My time is shallow.” Be it not lost, forgotten. Understandable your questions and severance pay us our dues. It reminds what of the hedgehog: Fierce and intimidating at some pass, but oddly timid in behavior while laying here; waiting still.
You’d be the first to know, oh, 4d-absent cherished. Let us take a short breath to rekindle that old flame!
Yours truly,
A hopeful feels
There’s a dutch saying that goes like this:
‘You will miss everytime if you don’t shoot’.
Well, its a rough and litteral transelation.
I AM THIS MAN!
I just need to find the woman…
7 Likes
So over the last couple days, I’ve met a potential someone, see Irish’s post. I’ve spent time with this person, helping them out and everything and then turns to me and says I don’t want a romantic relationship. After this person makes me dinner and has spent pretty much the last two days with me, like out of the blue and then keeps texting me asking if everything is alright. Sounds familiar huh? It’s my ■■■■■■■ rotten luck. The second, I display signs of affection and loyalty to a person, they don’t want anything to do with me even in a friendly manner. I mean helped them out of a personal crisis, we talked about personal things and I didn’t know the person. And you know that nervous puking thing I have, only once now ever since that I don’t know how to proceed.
I mean they made me dinner. That’s never happened. They didn’t get a frozen pizza or anything, no they made it from scratch. Brought all the oils, seasonings and everything and I don’t know.
Wur has yu been?
Oh how I wished I had a partner.
Past relationships either didn’t last long, ended in the other person cheating or the relationship stranded because of another family member.
And the person I started to see for awhile last year was trashtalking about my friends only a few days before the first date…