Me explaining the rules for this session.


Nintendo decides to trot out pokemon, and my brother still has siblings that are younger than me that know better than I do, so here we sit, yet again.

This time I decided to leave the version picking up to my niece who was the actual recipient of the holiday game. She chose to decide to leave me with Dazzling Pearl. Having done a cursorary google that means she gets the Johto dogs and I get the Kanto Birds, that makes my Gen 1 life happy, wheels up, lets do this.

We’ll start with the obvious ■■■■ this time around, I have pie roll for my trainer gender - he accidently rolls two different dice mobs, which lets me choose between 2 and 5.

I decide that if I ever bring this character online, it’ll probably be better to have a starter that looks like a master race poster for the reich vs a black dude named “Black Mage” so I opt for that hoping no one will notice.

We jump right in and already me and pie are fighting about starters - he wants infernape because it’s just unquestionably good, and I want piplup, becuase A) I like Bulky Waters (blastoise raised me) and b) It gets steel type later.

We run into some snags where I can’t see my tag and he rolls for me, and I end up with a female piplup!

This is important, because I’d decided that no matter what my starter was, if it was male, it’d be Pie. Otherwise, it’d be

Spoiler: It was hattie, and we (and by we, I mean me) made a lot of “water jokes” that are best left unsaid.

We honestly didn’t hit a lot of problems after that, doing the normal nuzocke stuff of “hitting every road because goddammit we need everything”.

Before starting the rock gym we had…

@Hattie the Piplup
@Benedict_87 the Starly
@Piemanlee the Shinx
@paulothead the Bidoof
@billthebetta the Budew
and @Jefe the Geodude

Some additional route milking earned us Krewl, the Onix, but she was not greatly needed in the boss fight.

It should be noted that in this version the xp share is pretty much default (also - i have no idea how to turn it off and dont care to) so we came in with an at level Piplup and Budew to really shake things up.

First gym was not really an issue (as expected) but the rock ■■■■■■■ threw out some ■■■■■■■ headbuts to make me second guess ever not farming levels again.

More time in the mines let us grab another nuzlocke champion in the form of Mick the zubat, who hopefully will make us never catch a goddamn zubat again. We also lucked out obsencely well and one shot ball caught Tem , the Abra on route 203.

There was some team galactic ■■■■, but it was mostly stumped by our second dirty bird, in fact Benny, type 2 (DirtyBirdII) that we found in the underground… a swablu…

Who pretty much ■■■■■■ everything there.

It was kind of hilarious to watch.

We also realized some things, primarily that we don’t need to worry about HM moves in this and that paul will need to be sidelined for something with more type coverage, and also that we could catch something north of town, which resulted in our own V101 becoming our first fighting type.

With these types, we rocke ■■■■ through several caves and a stupid double battle area and are now primed for gym fight number 3.

Current team and levels (praise god normal xp share)

@billthebetta , Level 26, the Budew
@Benedict_87 (DirtyBirdII) Level 24 the Swablu
@Piemanlee Level 26, the Luxio
@TemetNosce Level 25, the Kadabra
@VaultHunter101 Level 25, the Machop
@Hattie , Level 25, the Prinplup

Holding strong before gym number 3 and our first run of contests.

= Run notes so far

  • @Adabiviak became… no ■■■■ a goddamn Jirachi. There is a thing in this gen where if you own a pokemon save on your switch, there’s just a random ■■■■■■■ in the second (non gym) town that will just give you a mythic, either Jirachi (pokemon sword/shield) or mew (lets go pika/evee). I got Jirachi and ■■■■ myself, because im still doing a nuzlocke and thats still legal, but I immediately put him into a box named “limbo” because ho god, I’d really need an excuse to level him up. He’s level 5 now.

  • paul was originally intended to be a much more important part of the group, hence his being named after an hmslave. He was perfectly fine with this, leeching xp off the group… and honestly I would have too until I found out that hm slaving isnt needed in this gen? Basically you find someone and they give you TM’s that are the actual move, then your poketch learns to summon random pokemon to do the move? Weird. Regardless, as useful as bibariel is, it gets sidelined until we hit something that covers types better than tem or vh.

  • Every flying type will be different versions of @Benedict_87 . I don’t make the rules except when I do, and this is one of them.

  • @Pie ■■■■■■ up and got shinx. I should say here that even before I started, I knew that my starter was either going to be @Hattie or pie, based on gender. I’m told I rolled well that the starter was female, and hattie became a penguin. More importantly, pie is electric which covers some of hatties weaknesses, so I knew I wanted the first viable type diff thing to be him and he did not dissapoint, except where he did.

… Pie has Rivalry instead of intimidate, which means he is literally the horny cat. He will ■■■■ up every other male type (which statistically works out) but is weak against females. Because… reasons.

I trust all of you to hit him with the horny bat as needed.


Thus spake the first post.


I’m only allowed to mention up to 10 forumites a post, so the second post will include those not rostered yet.


In bank team members-

Other forumites-

@MickityMike , Level 4, the Zubat
@Jefe , Level 8, the Geodude
@paulothead , Level 15, the Bibarel
@KrewlraiN , Level 9, the Onix
@Curmudge0n , level 7, the Shellos
@Benedict_87 , (Dirtybird) Level 21, the Staravia
@Gamegeeks(unk), Level 10, Buneary
@xmngr , Level 15, Chingling
@RiddleMeThis1 , (Riddz) Level 16, Psyduck




Seriously dude, you are as confused as I am about how you wound up in there.

But you’re there in case temet dies…

Kind of



You were the pink one.


A sea slug. Well, I can just hope that it has some feline qualities :joy_cat:


So I’ve been pinged by the audience to describe how a Nuzlocke works and why all you ■■■■■■■ demons are included so… for the uninitiated, here’s a short history on nuzlocking and why it’s fun, and why you’re included.

The first thing you have to understand is that pokemon is a baby RPG designed for very young players. If you understand the base levels of the game… its (usually) very easy to do. A long time ago someone did a webcomic explaining how an experienced player might want to challenge themselves-

  1. You may only catch the first pokemon you hit on any route. If you kill that pokemon, you may not catch another on that route. Ever.

  2. When a pokemon faints, it dies.

There’s been quite a few variations and clauses added to this, and I go by the first version I met the challenge of, that done by team four star, who do Dragon Ball Z abridged.

I give you… the sound of their baby boy Ivan dying.

(ps, if you’re using headset… you want to lower that)

… This brings up the third usually accepted rule, “You must nickname a pokemon, so it means more when it dies

So… now that you know the horror, know that there are at least… some caveats, and clauses.

The first clause I believe in whole heartedly is

a) The species clause - This means that if I hit a new route and hit a pokemon that I have 1)captured, 2) captured, but not evolved, or 3) captured/and or evolved but have is now ■■■■■■■ dead, I can opt not to catupture that pokemon, and instead, continue to look one out that does not meet one of those grim statistics. This cuts down on a lot of grinding (ie, me leveling up a zubat for forever to make sure I cant catch crobat) or having multiples of pokemon (Like 9 geodudes) or have me catching the ghosts of my kin which I hate.

b) The “secondary catch clause” will let me look for pokemon on routes I’ve hit before as long as i look for them in unorthodox ways - ie, if I caught a pokemon in the grass on a route, then I can fish or headbutt a tree on that route. I’ve not done anything to this effect yet in this run, but I’m leaving it open so far, because it plays into the next bit.

c) If I full wipe, then instead of the run being over, I can still pull from the box. I’m thinking of making this dependent on b), where if I wipe and need to replenish, I can only do so using methods unlocked. However, if at any point I die and no pokemon live… the run is over.

d) Wobuffet clause. This is hard to explain without getting into a lot of ■■■■■■■ poke-math, but wobuffet is kind of the worst thing on the planet and a lot of nuzlocker’s dont count it. I firmly stand by this, having seen this math. Also because of the next clause.

e) Randoms stupid ■■■■■■■■ - I wiped once in sword/shield because of a random event that reverses the type chart. That’s stupid and I didn’t know about it. There are other things that might fit his, but they have to at least be as egrigious as point d).

Anyway, those are the base rules that we are observing for now. Please voice your rage over them in the chat below.

Now, back to our regularly scheduled pokemanning (or sleeping, depending how much vodka I hit).


Since I’m still drinking and in between mornings, there is another oft used nuzlocke rule that I’ma take a forum poll on.

It’s um… pretty straightforward. To be honest, in my previous runs I’d usually just kill any legendaries, but I also keep these games to trade with my niece with, so it’s a little different.


Should I be allowed to use legendaries or mythics? Typically in these runs there are rules that exclude event pokemon (like eevee) that can frequently extend to legendary pokemon. But other groups uh… tend to kill legendaries on site, because they kill group diversity.

By default I say that anything after the elite four is legal. But before is up for grabs. If I catch catch a legendary, how can I treat it?

It’s weirdly important to note that there is a pokemon in limbo, right now who’s fate is decided.

Will we #freeadab? Or will he become fodder for gabbies team?


  • It goes to the bank and your niece gets it. Period. No in game usage.
  • You can use it on this playthrough, but give it to her afterwards.

0 voters

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Fodder it is.

You like it hard, don’tcha?

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@billthebetta evolved…

In this goddamn town.

Where the ghost trainer said she’d fight me if I won a beauty contest or if I challenged her at the gym.

Bulbapedia told me that Bebe is where the bill of this verison is. She gives me eevee. If I’m not in platinum.

I went through 3 ■■■■■■■ contests.

Bill is my coolest pokemon with 20 stickers on his pokeball.

… war were declared.

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… Without describing all the not dying my team just did, I’m going to sum up the last 3 hours with a quote I just came up for.

“The next person to not show me to a pokecenter will ■■■■■■■ find out why I ■■■■■■■ need one.” - @Hattie


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What is this? And whatever this is, why am I only Level 4? I think I should be Level 100 - all the best people say so! Believe me!

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Level 4 orders of magnitude. So you’re actually level 10,000!!!


Sounds sarcastic…. But I’ll take it!

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Hey, it’s all in how you spin the numbers!




Oh. Pokemon.

Appropriate for my Dirty Starling avatar.

I have no idea what that is.
Bird with… cloud… wings? Okay.
The starling was a better fit for my other avatar, though.

If you come across a Rufflet, that would fit my Benny avatar…
Just sayin’…

Swablu has a rocket launcher?


It does not. But it does have something called “Dragon Breath” which could be a rocket launcher…

I like rocket launchers.

Okay… so I’m both Swablu and Staravia?
Do I have to RP as them?
Because based on what I Googled just now because I have no clue about anything Pokemon past generation 1 my deep and intimate knowledge of the Pocketmans, I have established that this would essentially be a comic roommate situation.

Staravia! Did you track mud into the bird cage again?




This leads to sex.

Horny bat you say…