Awesome (Non-Programming) Job Applications for Gearbox: Post Yours! What can you offer GBX?


(Chasing my Imago) #1

Hello GBX, with the announcement of BL3 confirmed, and the associated inquiry for hiring talent, I thought it would be prudent to allow people to post their qualifications for improving both the work environment at Gearbox Studios and the quality and innovation of Borderlands 3. Many of us, myself included, have absolutely ZERO experience with programming. But read through, you may be surprised to find incredibly useful people here, capable of great feats that you may not have thought were needed in your company.

I basically have my Bachelors in Psychology (holding off on degree to complete pre-med qualifications, but like, whatevs) and can offer conflict resolution and mediation, therapy for troubled programmers programming all that gore and stuff, and am pretty good with crazy people. You are gonna need some help me thinks to top the psychopathy of Handsome Jack. Also, I can help make Timothy’s coping strategies for having Jack’s face believable. Lastly, I have a background in Biology, and could help with the design of new creatures and plants, in both look and capabilities.

(I wasn’t sure what to title this thread. I’m scared it sounds official. It is not.)


(Watcher on the wall) #2

I already said this in the RTT but…I am skilled in the art of being a coffee wench. I also come with cats.


(Enemy of Thunder) #3

I have absolutely no skills… :frowning:


(Revolver "Revolver" "Pink Ocelot Terror Ghost" Ocelot) #4

I know how to use UE3, but I still haven’t gone through college yet, because I’m a tad bit too young. I just want money. Gearbox, can I just have money?


(Chasing my Imago) #5

Yeah, can we all have money?


(Enemy of Thunder) #6

This is a good idea


(Revolver "Revolver" "Pink Ocelot Terror Ghost" Ocelot) #7

Guys, lets petition for Gearbox to give their forum regulars free money for being so awesome.


(T Man) #8

I couldn’t do any programming ,but I could help out with ideas for Caricature creation, I could do vocals.
On the back end I could help out with promoting and advertising. I have a little network that I work, my site, youtube , blip, FB, and twitter. Its not very big but Im hoping to change that soon.


(Angry Crux Guy) #9

[quote=“ThatOneGuy23, post:3, topic:62538, full:true”]
I have absolutely no skills… :frowning:
[/quote]You have a pc correct? Do you use it for gaming? I’d say you could be a QA tester for pc.
Edity: I wouldn’t mind being a QA tester for PC myself.

[quote=“Omega59, post:7, topic:62538, full:true”]
Guys, lets petition for Gearbox to give their forum regulars free money for being so awesome.
[/quote]/signed


(The Sword In The Darkness ) #10

Erm… I’m good at writing. Not bad at guitar. Fluent in sarcasm. Dry humor.

???

Profit.


(in his Violent Holiday Spirits) #11

I can write and not to toot my own horn, but I can wax a mean dog. If you want your canines to be slippery, gimme a ring.


(with sidekicks: Shoulda, Coulda, and Woulda) #12

I’m really good at providing useless ideas.


(you can change the song, hun 🌻) #13

Snacks.

:boot:


(The 90 minute m e m e) #14

:sandal: i can provide :sandal:

(not sure why it’s a reply?)


([7-28 | Celestial Harmonia]) #15

Ha, if only.

Anyway, let me think.
Maybe VA or something?


(Poorly drawn Starlord) #16

I can design Raid bosses

http://forums.gearboxsoftware.com/showthread.php?t=370898&highlight=Crawmerax

and develop business models:

I swear if Bl1: Remastered comes as paid DLC to the “Handsome Collection” (seriously, that name is the worst thing ever.) I will be very angry.

Although, it would be a smart business move, release the thing people actually wanted as DLC to the thing they didnt want.

EDIT: This idea is copyright by Mr-Sandman, if GBX wants to buy the rights to this business Idea I will accpet payment of 1 free copy of Bl1: Remasted as a standalone game not connected to any other bundle(s) or other Borderlands parafranaleya.

Well, now im in a win-win situation.

I can provide insightful video analysis of ways to kill bosses.

and my M.S paint skills are legendary across the land.

I have also made dozens of extremly terrible games on GameMaker7, but I have no idea about any coding or anything.

I can also dance.

and crossdress

and make badass costumes

and thats about everything I’ve ever done. pls hire.


(99 HellbornKriegers) #17

I can park vehicles. Also can clean them.
I can prepare avocado MEAT sandwiches if you want to.h

Oh, forgot to add: I’m a weird guy, all companies need a weird guy within its staff, don’t they?


(Alex) #18

I can play test Xbox and Playstation! However like @Kitty_Jo said I as well come with cats… I will need my own parking spot and a special cat chair for my cat of the day


(Corbynre) #19

You make a 15 year old gamer cry when he see’s that one of his favorite VG producers are probably hiring and I cant do anything about the fact that I want to work for Gearbox, or Bethesda etc. but i’m only 15… Tear’s of joy for new content, tear’s of depression for the missed opportunity.


(Chasing my Imago) #20

@corbynre- The good part is that successful developers will continue to grow and build their teams as their reputation and technology allow for larger and more involved games. There will be more games to work on. Just keep working hard duder.