Sanctuary III Bounty Board - A place to post bounties

GOT A BOUNTY YA WANNA POST!!???
PUT IT HERE!!!


IF THE SHOE FITS
Lv. 21
Difficulty: Normal
Client: Mister Torgue High-Five Flexington of the Torgue company
Objective: Teach Foot Fiend a lesson.
Optional: Obtain heavy rubber gloves before departing, or don’t.
Rewards: $2,500 + Rare Grenade Mod: Fungal Flare Up

VAULT HUNTER!!! SOME ■■■■■■■ LEFT A MUDDY SHOE ON THE PLEATHER COUCH IN OUR LOBBY!!! WHY IS THIS A BIG DEAL!!??? MAYBE YOU MISSED THE PART WHERE I SAID THE SHOE WAS MUDDY AND ON OUR FANCY AS ■■■■ PLEATHER COUCHES!!! FIND A BANDIT MISSING A SHOE!!! OUR PATENTED FAST TRAVEL TRACING TECHNOLOGY HAS PLACED HIM SOMEWHERE IN THE SPLINTERLANDS!!! TEACH HIM SOME ■■■■■■■ MANNERS!!!

OH, AND MAKE DAMN SURE YOU GIVE YOUR LESSON IN PROPER COUCH ETIQUETTE TO THE RIGHT BANDIT!!! THERE COULD BE MORE THAN ONE MISSING A SHOE!!! MY EXPERTS HAVE TOLD ME THAT LONG RUBBER GLOVES CAN PROTECT YOUR FINGERS AGAINST THE MORE AGGRESSIVE TYPES OF FOOT FUNGUS!!! OR YOU CAN THROW CAUTION TO THE WIND LIKE A TRUE BADASS!!!

3 Likes

Aww, I thought this was serious (did a thing like this for BL2 that was a hoot). Here’s one:

The Rarest Gun in the Game
Level: yes
Difficulty: your favorite
Client: Ava
Objective: Reinvasion of Privacy
Optional: Penumbra Souvenir
Rewards: Green-rarity Nebula

Vault Hunter, I’m pretty sure Private Beans gave some of the notes from my diary to Lieutenant Preston, and I think he’s been sharing them with the local troops, who are going to start broadcasting them out of Tazendeer Ruins you gotta help me. If you just kill Preston, someone else might just take over broadcasting them, so you gotta send them a message to get them to stop. I need you to take out everyone in that area with the Westergun. They’ll recognize it when they see you carrying it, which will let them know that you killed Private Beans. When Preston is dead, pick up anything that he drops; it’ll have his initials on it. Bring it and the Westergun to the CoV broadcast station, change the channel, and leave the Westergun and whatever you grabbed from Lieutenant Preston on the ground in front of the transmitter. That will send a message to any future Maliwan guys not to mess with my stuff anymore. If you happen to see a Penumbra/Reaper in the area, kill it and bring back something it drops (I’m pretty sure that’s the guy who scrounged my notes from Beans). Leave whatever it dropped in my room. Marcus gave me some green Maliwan SMG that he says is the rarest in the game (something about the barrel and a broken rarity?) Anyway, it’s yours if you do this for me.

edit - because it sounded fun: Tediore FL4K took the mission, went at it with a Gunerang, Horizon, Smartgun XXL, and a Gibbergun. Tough fight at MM11 with those! Spiderant and Rakk were doing the heavy lifting. I snagged a fresh Westergun, hauled it to Lt. Preston, and killed him with it:




I didn’t see a Penumbra, so this is all Ava gets for proof:

5 Likes

Eff yo couch!

Lmao, I wish this was a real thing they’d do.

3 Likes

The Most Holy Quest

Level: 59 +/- 10
Difficulty: Bogus
Client: Psycho Bill
Objective: The Holyiest of Cups
Optional: Do it naked.
Rewards: Excalibastard

Uh, Vault Hunter, Dude, I require your ammediate assistance.

Psycho Fred has fallen seriously ill and there’s only one way to save him. We’ve heard rumors of a lost cup, King Arthur’s Holy Grail. Anyone who drinks of it will be cured of all their alements.

It’s lost somewhere in Storm Blind Complex, we’ve been searching for it but the Revenants who live there have been chasing us out!

I’ve found an echo log from a group of COV and it’s our only hint. Please help us Vault Hunter!!

Click the echo log below to start the transmission.

Summary

Hey! STEVE! Where are we?! Where’s that Calypso beat? start psycho singing

We came to a river, quarter past twelve, tried to cross her path but that bridge just fell.

There we met a lady, her voice like heaven, trapped us here for years, many 'bout seven.

With lips so smooth she a courtier from hell, promises a move to an endless cell. Seduced and used by her listless rest, we cried out to Athena to continue her quest.

We we’re on our way to the holy grail, try to save a life with an empty pail, but we’ve list six men, four less than the lot, quick dig a ditch I an ex on that spot.

So we dug and dug till the dirt bled red and buried our time in a wading bed. Now we’ve lost our path, beneath our feet, destiny lies our fate we’ll meet.

We were on our way to the holy grail, try to save a life with an empty pail, but we’ve lost six men, four less than the lot, now where were we seems I’ve lost my spot.

End transmission.

Bring me King Arthur’s Grail and the Excalibastard is yours.

2 Likes