The Ask The Aviants Holoshow!


(Super Badass Constructor ) #6092

A loader bot runs straight at Boulder while making a strange robotic buzzing noise…


(Cast Iron Chef) #6093

Boldur laughs. It is gigantic robot bee! All bees are welcome, Boldur does not care if organic or robotic! Come, give Boldur hug, but mind the bees! Boldur does not want to be stung!


(XB1: Abattoirista) #6094

Pam tosses him a plastic bear full of what would appear to be honey. The label indicates that this is ‘RoboBeeCorp-brand Premium Honey-like Syrup-esque Flavor Product.’

PAM:
It ain’t exact, but it’ll do in a pinch. And by ‘in a pinch,’ I mean ‘with booze.’ And by ‘with booze,’ I mean ‘screw tea, just get hammered.’


(Cast Iron Chef) #6095

Boldur laughs as the bees fly away revealing a very clean Boldur. Bees make honey and Boldur make lager! A good drink will be had by all!


(Super Badass Constructor ) #6096

The buzzing Loader stops running around Boldur, for the honey is gone. The excited robo-buzzing noise fades down to a very depressing low hum. Six more loaderbots excitedly buzz into the room. Upon hearing the depressing noise from the one who called them, they too start to make the same depressing buzz…


(Cast Iron Chef) #6097

Boldur throws his arms wide. Boldur’s bees are gone, but Boldur’s robotic men are here! Come give Boldur a hug!


(Super Badass Constructor ) #6098

All seven loaderbuzzers mumble one word in unison

Honey?


(Cast Iron Chef) #6099

The bees return carrying a large tray full of overflowing mugs. Yes! Honey makes the best mead and Boldur’s bees make the best honey! After the bees set the tray down on a table, Boldur quickly grabs the mugs and passes them around. Come! All must drink with Boldur, yeah?!


(Super Badass Constructor ) #6100

The odd gang of Loaders buzz happily, take the mugs, and happily run out of the room


(The One-Armed Bandit) #6101

Ernest, passing by the door to the holoshow set on his way back to his quarters, stops dead in his tracks as several large and armed robots spewing buzzing noises and holding mugs sprint past him.

Ernest: I am very confused.

Larry: Likewise.


(XB1: Abattoirista) #6102

Pam sits nearby, taking hits off of a flask labeled ‘RoboBeeCorp-brand Premium Honey-resembling Mead-like Furniture Polish.’ She is very drunk.

PAM:
I’ve been watching this whole time and I’m very confused.


(Super Badass Constructor ) #6103

The BEE Loaders return in greater numbers. Now they number in the twenties. They all frantically run around the room emitting that robotic buzzing noise again, searching for more sweet stuff…


(Penguin connoisseur.) #6104

Toby opens one of the supply closets behind the ATAH set.

TOBY:
Oh wait, there’s some honey in here…! Sorry for acting like a diva earlier, guys!


(Super Badass Constructor ) #6105

The BEE Loaders buzz excitedly and rush towards the supply closet. They rip the doors off and grab every jar they can. Some of them oddly learn against the closet and start vibrating, as if to shake pollen from a flower…


(Penguin connoisseur.) #6106

Toby gapes in shock at the spectacle before him, snapping out of it only when one of the weird-looking black and yellow robots takes his cup of honey-sweetened tea from him, and then runs off with the others who filched all of the honey.

TOBY (angry):
HEY!! GET BACK HERE WITH THAT!!

Toby belly-slides after the robots, determined to find out why they are stealing all of the honey aboard Nova.


(Benedict's Glorious Wingspan) #6107

Continued from this post…

KID ULTRA:
KIIIIIIIIIDDDDDD ULLLLTRRAAAAA!!!

Kid Ultra stands on the holoshow set with a thumbs up towards the camera, seemingly oblivious to the bee related chaos behind him.

KID ULTRA:
Ha ha ha ha… no. This doesn’t have anything to do with Benedict’s story. I just wanted a little face time. Carry on!


BACK AT THE EVANGELIZING HOLY REDEMPTION CHURCH OF THE HOLY REDEEMING REDEEMER…

Benedict points with an accusatory talon at the Buteonen priest, currently engaged in sexual congress with…

BENEDICT:
A FINISCI!!! I think I’m gonna be sick!

"PRIEST:"
W-w-what in the ETERNAL FEEDIN’ GROUNDS are you doing in this HOLY SANCTUARY durin’ my off hours!

BENEDICT:
What the hell are ya doin’ SINNIN’ against the Great Eagle an’ makin’ a CRIME AGAINST NATURE!!! FLIGHT AN’ FLIGHTLESS AIN’T FULLY GENETICALLY COMPATIBLE!!! AN’ FLIGHT AN’ FINISCI ARE EVEN LESS COMPATIBLE!!! YA EVEN HAVE THAT ON THE HOME PAGE OF YER WEBSITE, AN’ HERE YA ARE! SINNIN’! I OUTTA BLOW YER ASS UP RIGHT NOW!!!

FINISCI HOOKER:
NO! HE PAY ME FIRST! HE ORDER SPECIAL ROYALE! HOLD PICKLES, HOLD LETTUCE, NO MAYO!!

BENEDICT:
And YOU just… wait… what?

PRIEST:
THIS ISN’T WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!!!

BENEDICT:
OH? WELL WHAT IS IT THEN?

FINISCI HOOKER:
IT NINE FIFTY AN HOUR IF HE WATCH!!

BENEDICT:
I DON’T WANNA WATCH!!

FINISCI HOOKER:
Then why you looking?

BENEDICT:
BECAUSE IT’S SHOCKING!!! LIKE A MIDAIR COLLISION!! I DON’T WANNA WATCH—actually, I would like to watch a midair collison…

PRIEST:
WELL CONGRATULATIONS, THAT’S JUST WHAT YOU’RE GONNA GET!

The priest flies at Benedict. He instinctively blows his head off with the rocket launcher. He and the Finisci stand in stunned silence as his body collapses to the ground.

BENEDICT:
Sh*t, I thought they disabled crits on this thing…

FINISCI HOOKER:
Ya wanna loot his corpse?

BENEDICT:
Well, I might as well get my money back.

FINISCI HOOKER:
You mean my money!

BENEDICT:
NOT IF I GET THERE FIRST B***H!!!

Benedict runs forward, slips in the priest’s blood and falls face first into a table.

BENEDICT:
OWWWWWWWW!

The Finisci laughs as she slides on her belly into the donation storage room.