The Gearbox Multiverse Role Play/In-Character/Storytelling Thread


(Penguin connoisseur.) #4127

Pam looks over at Junior, who is comatose on one of the seats, with various dipping sauces covering his beak.

PAM:
I think we’re good.


(Benedict's Glorious Wingspan) #4128

BEATRIX: (Momentarily distracted from her sudden interest in Apollo’s inoculations)
Hm… I don’t know how I feel about candied nuts… well, it can’t possibly be worse than Benedict’s candied jerky.

Beatrix pops one in her mouth.

BEATRIX:
Mmm… lackluster. 6 out of 10. Not enough sugar, too much artificial walnut flavoring, but still edible if nothing else is available.

ARCUS:
Docking procedures complete mistress.

BEATRIX:
Excellent. Well, first thing’s first, we can’t have anyone on board who hasn’t had their standard inoculations. Apollo? Your choice. Voluntary, or involuntary?

She holds up the injector with a grin.


(Meme Crusader) #4129

Apollo: I don’t think I ever got those cause up until right after I joined the army my dad was takin care of me. Yeah he died minutes after, doc said it was the most sudden polio death he’d ever seen.


Yeah sure buddy.


(Benedict's Glorious Wingspan) #4130

BEATRIX:
Awww… that’s truly a touching story of heartache and loss, and I want you to know, as your physician…

She jams him in the arm with the incistyx injector.

BEATRIX:
You can feel free to contact me anytime should you develop any side effects to these inoculations. Nurse Sardianus! Band-Aid! Hm… it looks like we’ve only got 'em in pink for a puncture wound that size. Oh well. At least they match. Let’s prep the patients for surgery. And let’s see which of my other nurses actually bothered to show up…

She lowers the loading ramp.


(Penguin connoisseur.) #4131

Pam blinks, taking a second to realize that Beatrix is talking to HER, and then nods and goes to one of the cabinets for a large Band-Aid. As she applies it to Apollo’s arm, Toby walks over to her, and she glances over at him distractedly. Then she does a double-take as she sees what he is wearing, and smirks.

PAM (playfully):
Toby Sardianus, are you wearing catchpants.

TOBY (blushing slightly):
Yeah. Do you… Do you like them…?

PAM (giggling):
Oh yeah, they’re really sexy.

Toby, more confident, begins to pose for his nestmate, ignoring Siax’s barely suppressed laughter.

TOBY:
Colby gave them to me. I think I may start wearing them regularly.


(Benedict's Glorious Wingspan) #4132

COLBY:
Did I mention they’re completely watertight? And DURABLE? That’s right. Frederico’s Finisci Fashion Catchpants also serve as washable contraceptives and protection against 89% of all known sexually transmitted infections!

Siax snorts and makes no attempt to conceal his laughter now.

COLBY:
Oh, I’m sorry! Excuse me for wanting to be intimate without accidentally creating a child I’m not ready to take care of, a**hole! What was the last thing you were intimate with again? Your left flip–talon? Is that what you call it?


(XB1: Abattoirista) #4133

Rex is suddenly interested in the idea of candied jerky.

REX:
What was the score on the aforementioned jerky, by the way?

Rex suddenly loses interest in food and finishes repacking his duffel, albeit with a couple of the larger sandwiches he produced earlier stuffed inside.


(Benedict's Glorious Wingspan) #4134

BEATRIX:
3 out of 10. Artificial strawberry mango and venison really don’t mix. Ugh!


(Penguin connoisseur.) #4135

PAM (timidly):
Shouldn’t we ger Mr. Lukas to the medbay…? I don’t trust my impromptu biopsy…


(Benedict's Glorious Wingspan) #4136

BEATRIX:
Nurse Alani, where is Nurse Miko?

ALANI: (Through gritted teeth)
I’m not your nurse, Beatrix…

BEATRIX:
And where’s Nurse Ambra? Nurse Igrin? Nurse Alani, are you the only one here?

ALANI:
Ambra said she would rather freeze to death in space than serve as your nurse, which is fine with me. Miko is performing emergency surgery on The Lorrian. As for Ernest, does he even have basic medical training?


(XB1: Abattoirista) #4137

REX:
Damn. I was intrigued until I heard about the strawberry.


(Super Badass Constructor ) #4138

A Tea kettle whistles somewhere in cyberspace. This lady loves a nice hot cup a tea while playing her favorite game ever, Killer Kart Kombat. While the Hyperon Entertainment System finds some open game lobbys, she prepares a cup of Hibiscus Rose Tea. Shes been quite board latly. This absurd system shes stuck in has been awfully quiet latly. While that is a blessing in itself, she finds herself letting her guard down and that the silence has been … unsettling. It’s quite an unusual feeling.

She brings her tea over to her coffee table to steep while watching that cute little loading symbol on the game do its jiggy little dance. It jumps to the left, and then it stops to the right… it puts its hands to its hips… then GAME F-F-FOUNDnnnddndddd

The lady stares at the lobby screen with an odd tilt to her head. Everything is so… glitchy looking… She has never seen this track before… Hrm, curious… Must be a beta testing lobby perhaps. She highlights the connect button and hits the enter key.

The lobby loads oddly quickly for a glitchy looking session. Her avatar loads on the starting square casually sipping at her tea. She looks around at all these crazy characters… some bird man, a grumpy looking man wearing red and black, a DAHL soldier… she thinks its DAHL… and then…

She spits her tea out as she notices a familiar avatar… SHE THOUGHT HE GOT BANNED. OH SHES GOING TO KICK THAT CHEATERS ARSE IN. Before she could raise a finger and tell out a challange to MINREC, something else catches her eye… a giant fluffy pink … ball thing… such a familiar shape… OH NEVER MIND. She points at MINREC.

OH YOU DIRTY CHEATER, ILL KICK YOUR ARSE IN ANYDAY.


(Benedict's Glorious Wingspan) #4139

MINREC:
YOU!!! MINREC REMEMBERS YOU!!! MINREC NEVER FORGETS AN INFIDEL WHO REFUSES TO ACCEPT HIS MAD SKIIILLLLLZZZZZZ!!!

BENEDICT: (Faceclawing)
I don’t suppose you can get a message to Chronicle that we’re stuck in here?


Siax and Arcus slowly place Lukas down on one of two waiting stretchers.

BEATRIX:
The Koyukka is stabilized, but the Titocorax is not. We will need to perform emergency surgery on him as soon as we get to the surgical bay. Alani, I will need you, and we should probably go now. The rest of you, get Duncan onto the other stretcher.

Beatrix begins running with Lukas’ stretcher, then jumps up on one of the support bars while holding onto the push bar and shouts “WHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE” as she rides the stretcher into the hall.


(XB1: Abattoirista) #4140

Rex quickly moves to help the others get Duncan onto the stretcher, making sure he’s secured. He’s left his bag on the shuttle for the moment, figuring he can go bring everyone else’s gear over later. He helps the others haul Duncan onto the ship.

REX (thinking out loud):
Not how I expected to get here…

REX:
Definitely not how I expected to get here.


(Penguin connoisseur.) #4141

TOBY (muttering):
Wait until you’ve met Kid Ultra or Oscar Mike…


(Benedict's Glorious Wingspan) #4142

Meanwhile, somewhere in Darkspace…

KID ULTRA: (Gasping)
Someone calls for me! MY HELP IS NEEDED!!! TURN BACK!!! SOMEONE ON NOVA NEEDS KIIIIIIIIIIIDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD UUUUULLLLLLLLLLLLTTTTTTTTTTTTTRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

PHOEBE:
Oh do be quiet! Enough of your childish insecurities! We need you here!

ISIC: (Standing next to the airlock)
Now wait a minute, madam. If the fella wants to go back to Nova, maybe we should let him. Ultra, come here! I want to show you the top secret scenic route back to Solus!


(XB1: Abattoirista) #4143

REX:
I’ve heard plenty of stories about Mike, I’ve got an idea of what to expect. I’ve heard… enough stories about Kid Ultra.

He shudders slightly.


(Benedict's Glorious Wingspan) #4144

Arcus calls out from the surgical room on Beatrix’s shuttle.

ARCUS:
Hey guys? We could use some help with him! I think he got heavier since we lifted him out of…

SIAX:
He’s still strapped to the table, Arcus.

A pause.

ARCUS:
Way to make me look like a jackass Siax. Alright. Everybody make way!


(Penguin connoisseur.) #4145

Toby picks up Junior and then steps out of the way, to give the stretcher clearance. He and Pam then waddle over towards Colby.

TOBY (awkwardly):
Umm… Colby? Thanks again for helping me, you know… Look like less of an assh*le. Pam and I are going to take Junior to our quarters to put him down for a nap- If our quarters are still OURS, that is… -a-and i just wanted to let you know that our door is always open to you. If you want, you can come and have dinner with us later. I-I mean… If you don’t want to stay here to make sure that your squadmates are okay, of course!

Toby and Pam start waddling off towards their quarters, Junior already starting to doze off in his father’s flippers.


RATH:
Ah. Another who has mastered the technique of channeling their anger into their abilities. We shall see who’s “mad skillz” are superior! Let us begin!


(Benedict's Glorious Wingspan) #4146

The remaining starting squares are filled with players from around Solus. Oscar Mike emerges from the skin customization booth dressed as himself, but with lipstick scribbled all over his armor like crayon.

OSCAR MIKE:
BENNY!!! BENNY!! I FIGURED OUT HOW TO GET OUT OF THE SIMULATOR ROOM!!!

Benedict folds his arms, now locked into the starting square as the countdown begins for net sync. He looks at Oscar Mike’s drawings scribbled all over his armor.

BENEDICT:
Uh-huh. Is that what ya were doin’ in there? Math?

OSCAR MIKE:
No! This one’s a surrealistic interpretation of the noble Jennerit Warfang at the Battle of Binax! And this one’s a moo cow! But drawing helps me relax, and more to the point, it helped me to think of a way out of our predicament!

BENEDICT:
Yeah, the race is startin’ in like thirty seconds, bro.

OSCAR MIKE:
All we gotta do is make out!

Benedict stands dumbfounded for about 5 seconds before responding.

BENEDICT:
What?

OSCAR MIKE:
The simulator room protects against all kinds of self injury, EXCEPT when you take physical pleasure from getting hurt while making out!

Benedict pauses again.

BENEDICT:
HOW IN THE HELL DO YOU KNOW THAT!!???

OSCAR MIKE:
Well, I was eavesdropping on Whiskey and Deande…

BENEDICT:
Never mind.

OSCAR MIKE:
So let’s start making out, and then I’ll stab you in the gut, and when I do, you just say, “Yeah! Harder! Harder, baby!”

BENEDICT:
NO! NO!!! WE ARE NOT RESORTING TO THAT!!!

OSCAR MIKE:
But BENNY!!!

BENEDICT:
NNOOOOOO!!! START THE F**KING RACE ALREADY!!!

HYBRID VOICE:
Children of THE DRAGON!!! ENTER YOUR CHARIOTS!!!

Benedict and the others are transported to their vehicles on the starting grid. Benedict hops onto his Tishaar Firefalcon, quickly running through the startup sequence and trying to take his mind off the mental images that have been conjured up by…

HEAD OSCAR MIKE:
C’mon Benny, ya know ya wanna…

BENEDICT:
NO!!! BRAIN!!! YOU ARE NOT TURNING THAT INTO AN IMAGINARY FRIEND!!! GO F**K YOURSELF!!!

He slams his head against the side of his Firefalcon to knock that particular image from his mind. It shimmers, and is replaced with a female Buteonen who looks strangely similar to himself.

HEAD SHALENE:
Better?

BENEDICT:
Eeeehehhhhehhhhhhhhh… yeah. I could get behind that.

HYBRID VOICE:
THE RACE WILL BEGIN IN… 10… 9… 8…