#44

As Toby: You spelled out “tawdry”, you potato-brained douche!

#45

…F**k.

2 Likes
#46

Seriously though, THAT was an awesome post. I loved the hidden message. If you aren’t made a community badass at some point along Battleborn’s lifespan, then people just don’t respect good quality comedy anymore.

2 Likes
#47

@Benedict_87 @EdenSophia both provide such beautiful and amusing and awesome heart, soul, and personality for this community of ours!

@HandsomeCam

1 Like
#48

I deny everything.

#49

Nope only ult stuff changed

#50

Agreed.

#51

@FlamesForAll @HandsomeCam
Now, now… it ain’t about the rewards. It’s about annoying the a**holes I work with. And venting. And spreading the word…

Hey guys…
Have you heard?
Have you heard… the word?

Waits with anticipation with the needle just above the record…

2 Likes
#52

@Benedict_87

The bird…the bird is the word…

1 Like
#53

Don’t. YOU. DARE!

#54

Don’t get him started!

#55

Benedict inches the needle closer to the record.

1 Like
#56

…Go ahead; i f**king dare you!

#57

A-WELL-A EV’RYBODY’S HEARD, ABOUT THE BIRD, BIRD BIRD BIRD…

Ghalt comes to the door.

GHALT:
EMERGENCY SECURITY OVERRIDE 1-2-5-7-Baker-Charlie-Chocolate-Thunder!!!

The door opens. Ghalt enters brandishing two shotguns

GHALT:
I WARNED YOU!!! I F**KING WARNED YOU!!!

Benedict ducks for cover. Ghalt blasts Benedict’s record player with his shotguns. Repeatedly.

1 Like
#58

Aaaand that’s why Ghalt is captain.

1 Like
#59

@Benedict_87 @HandsomeCam

Just as I just got my Lore challenge First Blood against a Poor Marquis, Ghalt just got another First Blood against Benny’s record player…

1 Like
#61

Marquis is anything but “poor”. Otherwise, his faulty programming would cause him to view himself as a hobo, and kill himself.

1 Like
#62

I love the relationship between ISIC and The Magic Luchador himself!
The fact that he litterally ripped off his arms, is just funny as hell to me.
In The Algorithm, if you complete the lore challenge or not, you can hear the magic luchador say that hes finally won and hes the champion again, I just think thats badass.

1 Like
#63

Nobody said Mike and Montana? My favorite is when Mike just starts belting out Montana’s song. I also love all the things Montana says about Whiskey when he’s on the enemy team.

#64

Back on topic… and now that I’ve cleaned up the remains of my poor… poor… record player… Naw I’m just kiddin’. That thing was a piece of junk! The record too! I don’t even like that song! I just saw it on TV once and thought it’d be a really, really funny way to taunt my co-workers. And it was. And I have no regrets. Except the shrapnel in my arm. Ow.

Anyway… BACK ON TOPIC…

Call me a hopeless ol’ romantic, but I think my favorite relationship is… well… Reyna and Ghalt.
PLOT TWIST!!! You expected me to say me and my mirror didn’t you? Or me and Boomsday? Naw. Naw.
Reyna and Ghalt. I’d love to see those two finally tie the knot! They were MADE for each other. Not literally. At least I don’t think literally. Oh Great Eagle, now I’m picturing Reyna ripping off her skin and revealing a Terminator. Shakin’ that image off… Anyway, yeah… they’d be the best couple. Whiskey and Deande? Their relationship is just weird. Miko and Kelvin? Weird. Orendi and Toby? Weird. Alani and Galilea? Ok… they’d make a cute couple too. They’re my second favorite. But Reyna and Ghalt can actually have children thogether, and that pushes 'em ahead for me. As an old war hawk who’s spent a little time in the nest, I can tell ya… the kids? They’ll drive ‘em nuts… but at the end of the day they won’t wanna trade a single moment away from ‘em. It’s beautiful to see your little nestlings hatch. See ‘em… peckin’ out of their little shells. And… I think Ghalt and Reyna both deserve that. I think they deserve a little light in their lives after all they’ve been through. Wish I still had…
…
…
…
Hey… you know what just occurred to me? Alani and Galilea could adopt! That’s cool too! I’m picturing Alani being all nurturing like, makin’ ‘em fish or seaweed or whatever the hell she eats… and then Galilea comes home and trips over the toys… uh-oh!!! Looks like someone’s gettin’ one HELL of an ass whoopin’! Get it? Cuz… cuz she’s got that whole demonic dark side thing? Yeah. You get it. Hell… those kids would be the most well behaved kids in the arbor village!

EDIT: Block. I meant to say “block.” Not “arbor village.” My bad. Forgot you guys live ON THE GROUND. Not me. I like to be HIGH. Not… not in a drug use kind of way… but… you know what I meant. Wings. Flying. Flying puns. Etc. You know how I do.

1 Like